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Joke number 1
Roster compitetion

An old farmer decided it was time to get a
new rooster for his hens. The current rooster
was still doing an okay job, but he was getting
on in years. The farmer figured getting a new
rooster couldn't hurt anything. So he buys a
young cock from the local rooster emporium, and
turns him loose in the barnyard.

Well, the old rooster sees the young one strutting
around, and he gets a little worried. "So, they're
trying to replace me," thinks the old rooster.
"I've got to do something about this."

He walks up to the new bird and says, "So you're
the new stud in town? I bet you really think
you're hot stuff, don't you? Well I'm not ready
for the chopping block yet. I'll bet I'm still
the better bird. And to prove it, I challenge
you to a race around that hen house over there.
We'll run around it ten times and whoever finishes
first gets to have all the hens for himself."

The young rooster was a proud sort, and he
definitely thought he was more than a match for
the old guy. "You're on," said the young rooster.

"And since I know I'm so great, I'll even give
you a head start of half a lap. I'll still win
easy," said the young rooster.

The two roosters go over to the hen house to
start the race with all the hens gathering around
to watch. The race begins and all the hens start
cheering the roosters on. After the first lap,
the old rooster is still maintaining his lead.
After the second lap, the old guy's lead has
slipped a little but he's still hanging in there.
Unfortunately the old rooster's lead continues
to slip each time around, and by the fifth lap
he's just barely in front of the young rooster.

By now the farmer has heard all the commotion.
He runs into the house, gets his shotgun, and
runs out to the barnyard figuring a fox or something
is after his chickens. When he gets there, he
sees the two roosters running around the hen
house, with the old rooster still slightly in
the lead. He immediately takes his shotgun, aims,
fires, and blows the young rooster away.

As he walks away slowly, he says to himself,
"Damn, that's the third gay rooster I've bought
this month."

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